Whoa there, weary traveler! Sit awhile and hear my news.

Tell me, have you heard of the Emperors of Narsil? The Mandoran Invasion of Brethony? No? What of The Skalbard Coast? Cranholt on the Mersana River? Pharazel Maheris’s “Lives of the Great Viceroys”? Why, then you haven’t heard of The Falcon’s Children , the first in a YA fantasy trilogy by Ross Douthat! You’re in luck, because the formerly Substack exclusive serial will appear in print next year via the Catholic imprint Luminor .

What’s that, traveler? You wonder if I speak of that Ross Douthat? Why yes, the very same right-wing writer who is so beloved at prestigious publications, from which lofty heights he considers things like spiritual malaise and populism after Trumpism . Yes, he who recently forsook his knighthood at the New York Times ’s op-ed page, and journeyed from the tower in the Square of Times to serve at the foot of Bari Weiss and her hobbled 60 Minutes. Perhaps as a new Andy Rooney , only this time he’s angry at the woke pope?

Didst not thou know that Douthat has long been nurturing a side gig as a kids fantasy guy?

Maybe Douthat’s turn to the speculative shouldn’t be too surprising, traveler. After all, a 2010 Mother Jones profile described his conservative vision as falling “into the realm of the utopian—it’s magical, Tolkien-like thinking.”

No, I’ve been too busy here at the tavern with my wizard ale to read much of The Falcon’s Children, beyond snippets of the first chapter (which you can read for free) . But I’m sorry to report that the ravens speak of ill reviews. Slate’s book critic Laura Miller reviewed the opening pages back in 2023 and seemed unimpressed (“If the rest of the novel is like Chapter 1, it needs to be rewritten from top to bottom…”).

But I won’t presume to speak for you, traveler. Perhaps you like dense, fantastical works? Douthat himself describes this project as speculative historical fiction, and the data-dumping, supplemental world-building documents are certainly dense with history and archangels . There’s of course a hand drawn map , too. Why, it’s not real fantasy until there’s a hand drawn map! On this you must agree.

Who might read this? Who’s to say, traveler. Perhaps if you’re a young apparatchik at the Heritage Foundation and your children tire of hearing William F. Buckley Jr. speeches before bedtime, you might read this to them. But beyond that, you’ll find my pockets hold many Mandoran coins, but no answers that will satisfy your query.